Sunday, April 15, 2012

Brenda's Eclectic Editing

Girlfriend's business has been going places lately. Which makes sense, because she's really, really good at what she does.

Everything I've written in the last couple of years has gone through her before anyone else has seen it. Working with her has improved my writing more than any college level writing course did, and I'm pretty sure in another couple of years I'll have learned more from her than I did from my degree. A lot of the improvements in my process have come in part from conversations with her, and I don't even keep track of how many times she's helped talk me through a sticking point in a plot.

If you ever need a helpful ear, or a critical eye for anything you write, I can't recommend BEE Editing enough. Check it out; it's awesome.

Thursday, April 5, 2012

Getting back into running

I'm restarting all sorts of things these last few weeks. I spent the winter bulking up to drive my lifting, but now that it's getting nice out again I've started running again.

Just like with lifting, I'm not a particularly good runner. My best 5k time was 26:55 and that was two years and 25lb ago. Last year I ran three races and finished between 28 and 30 minutes on all of them.

But even so, I like running. Usually I don't waste my time doing things I'm bad at, but running is different than, say, darts or first person shooters. I can 'sprint' for a couple of blocks and walk for a couple of blocks and still have fun because I get to go fast for a little bit. Or I can plod along for most of a mile and feel good because I did manage to catch and pass someone walking their dog.

And in a way, that might be part of why I like running. Most everything else I do I have to work for, whether it's hitting a PR squat, or banging out a chapter, or even beating a videogame. Doing poorly at any of those things hurts in one way or another. But it's okay to suck at running; the worst that can happen is I end up going for a walk instead.

And so I'll head out again today in my funny toe shoes and cat-scratched shorts and just have fun looking at the trees and feeling the sun and breathing the crisp spring air.

Monday, March 26, 2012

In which I review a book about vampires fighting Jesus

33 A.D. by David Mcafee is not about Jesus as Buffy, but rather, the effects that Jesus has on the vampire community of Jerusalem. Theron is the vampire council's top enforcer/assassin tasked with killing Jesus to stop the spread of his vampire-repelling faith armor. Taras is his counterpart in the Roman legion trying to solve the murders sweeping the city.

I'm not exactly the target audience for this book. I haven't identified as Christian in about six years, and I've never been a fan of the vampire genre. That said, this is a damn good book. The pacing is outstanding, and the numerous subplots lend a richness that has to be read to be appreciated. There were a handful of times when the symbolism got rather heavy-handed, but not enough to bog the story down.

Theron really carries the story, as he should. He's just conflicted enough with his encounters with Jesus to fit the mythology, but not enough to make his internal conflict override his struggle with the vampire council and the Legion. I was honestly hoping for a little more fireworks during the crucifixion (spoiler alert: Jesus dies), but the effects of the resurrection make up for it.

McAfee sets us up for a sequel, and like a dealer handing out samples, attaches a preview at the end of 33A.D.

This was a fast read, but there's enough here to get lost in. It is a fantasy, but based on how much I liked it, I'd recommend it to anyone who can stomach the blood.

5/5

Friday, March 23, 2012

Experimenting with the process

I started rewriting the first book I ever submitted for publication this week. Its actually the third book I tried to write, the first two being abortive failures in every sense but what they taught me about the process. So by my count, by the time this is done it will be the sixth time I've attempted to write a book.

And what I'm noticing since I finished drafting Nomads (the fifth book I've written but the third book I'll publish) is that my drafting process has slowed down. I'm a lot more careful with my word choice and sentence structure, and I've actaully used the backspace key on the first run through a scene. As a consequence, my words per hour have fallen from 600ish to about 200ish.

My hope is that taking more time on the initial pass will cut down the extent ant number of edits needed for polish, and will end up saving time over the course of the process. And eventually maybe I can get good enough to take this same level of care but still draft at haphazard speed.

I'll give it a shot for science.

Monday, March 19, 2012

A Father and a Daughter, revisited

This is a rewrite of one my first stories, and will be available as an ebook in summer 2012.


A Father and a Daughter



The apartment’s buzzer startled Brad Verne so much he almost dropped his beer. He never got visitors. Pushing away from the table, he pressed the intercom button.

“Yeah?”

“Hi, Dad,” the garbled speaker said. “It’s Cheryl. Can I come up?”

He pushed the door button in response and looked out his apartment’s window. After a beat, he pushed the chair under the table and crossed to the bed under the window. He threw the blankets over the bed and ran a hand over them to smooth the wrinkles. The pizza boxes in the counter couldn’t be helped, but he gathered the empties off the table and dropped them into the garbage. A knock at the door made him jump again.

He took a breath and undid the chain, latch, and deadbolt. Cheryl had her cell phone out when he pulled the door open.

“Hey.”

“Hi, Dad.” She wore her hair long, braided with bits of colorful ribbon. Her duster was open, and the embroidery decorating the outside matched the colors in her hair. She’d gotten a lip ring since the last time Brad had seen her.

“Come in.”

She did. “I can’t stay long.”

“You just got here. Sorry for the mess.”

“Don’t worry about it. I wanted to talk to you in person.”

“Is it about your mom?”

“No.”

“That’s good at least.”

“It’s about me and Mark.”

“Who?”

“Mark. The guy I live with?”

“Oh. The pretty boy. You’re still with him?”

“Dad—”

“Is he working? Are you working?”

“Can you let me talk?”

“We’re talking. I’m trying to get some context. Okay? You want to talk about you and Mark.”
She sighed. “Yes. We’ve been getting pretty serious lately. And last week we were out on a walk and we were talking—”

“About what?”

“If you let me finish, I’ll tell you.”

“We’re having a conversation, aren’t we?”

“I’m trying to. We were talking about our relationship. And he… um.”

“What?”

“He asked me to marry him. And I said yes.”

“Did he give you a ring?”

“What? What does that matter?”

“If he’s going to marry my daughter he’d better fucking give you a ring.”

“That doesn’t matter! I’m getting married.”

“Okay.”

“That’s it? ’Congratulations, Cheryl, I’m so happy for you that you’re marrying the man you love.’ Nothing?”

“Yeah, it’s great. If you’re happy, that’s great. Congratulations.”

“Thanks.”

Silence.

“So, yeah, we’re thinking about saving up for a year and having a small ceremony next spring.”

“Good for you. I can’t help you out, you know.”

“Yeah.”

“I would, but your mother—”

“I know, Dad. Do you want us to invite you?”

“You can do whatever you want, obviously. I would hope I would get invited to my own daughter’s wedding.”

“That’s why I was asking; sometimes you don’t like those sort of things.”

“Well, I appreciate your concern. Yes, if you would deign to invite me, I would like to go.”

“Okay, okay. That’s good; I want you there. I just wanted to ask first.”

“Make sure you make him sign a pre-nup.”

“I know, Dad.”

“Hey, that’s just my opinion. If you want to tell me to fuck off, that you don’t need my advice, that you two love each other—that’s fine.”

“No, I know; it’s in the plans. There’s just a lot going on all of a sudden. But I’ll take care of it, okay?”

“Okay. Like I said, that’s fine. Do what you want.”

Cheryl stuck her hands in her coat pockets and rocked from her toes to her heels. Brad took off his glasses and vigorously cleaned them on the inside of his shirt.

“So, I guess I’ll be going,” Cheryl said after a minute.

“Okay.” Brad put his glasses back on. “Good seeing you. Thanks for stopping by.”

“Yeah. Good seeing you too.” She took a half-step toward him, stopped herself, and then went to the door. “I’ll let you know what our plans are as soon as I know what they are.”

“Sounds good.”

She opened the door and paused. “Bye, Dad.”

“Yep.”

Her brow furrowed for an instant. “Bye.” She pulled the door closed behind her.

Brad cleaned his glasses again as soon as she was gone. He went to the window and looked out over the parking lot. He saw Cheryl’s car pull out into the street a minute later. Bumper stickers covered the sedan’s trunk, and Cheryl’s hand-painted zodiac signs flowed back from the hood over the doors. The car squealed metal on metal when it paused at the stop sign at the corner, and then rumbled away.

He looked out the window for a moment longer, and then grabbed the phone off the wall and jabbed at the numbers.

“Hello?”

“You think you can warn me before you send Cheryl over here?”

“What? Where are you? What’s she talking to you about?”

“I’m at my house, Lynn. Where do you think?”

“Put Cheryl on the phone.”

“She just left. I’m sure you can get all the details when she reports back.” He started pacing at the end of the phone cord.

“I haven’t seen her in a week. Are you drunk?”

“Answer the question.”

“What question?”

“You send Cheryl over here to start a fight instead of talking to me in person? What do you think I am?”

“I’m not talking to you like this.”

“Oh, so how would you rather—”

Click.

Brad sighed through his nose and ran his hands over his scalp. The digital alarm clock on the nightstand started beeping. He slapped at it and knocked over the picture next to it. Three-thirty already. Brad set the picture back on the nightstand. In it, he and Lynn sat on a tree stump while seven-year-old Cheryl played in the leaves at their feet. He grabbed his keys and wallet from the table and headed out the door.

After a quick walk to the 7-11 a few blocks down, Brad returned to the apartment building with a pair of travel mugs full of coffee and a handful of gas station pastries. There were two apartments on the first floor; the superintendent’s faced the laundry room, and the other was tucked at the end of the hallway past the storage lockers and garbage room. Brad went to the latter and knocked.

No response for a minute, so he knocked again, louder this time. Someone mumbled something inside, and Brad swore under his breath. Another minute passed, and finally the door cracked open.

“Hello?”

“Hi, Frank; it’s Brad.”

“Oh,” the old man croaked. “Hello. How are you?”

“I brought you your coffee. Did you forget?”

“No. No, I didn’t forget. Come in.” He tottered back, opening the door for Brad.

“Thanks.” He strode past Frank and set the coffees and pastries on the table. Frank’s apartment was three times the size of his own studio. Boxes of newspapers and magazines rimmed the baseboards of the living room. The TV faced the dining room table, and the remote had taped-on paper labels covering most of the buttons. A trio of large framed pictures of Frank and his dead wife faced Frank’s seat at the table. The medals hanging in the box on the wall adorned Frank’s Navy uniform in the oldest picture, and his laughing wife pressed her cheek into his shoulder.

“How you feeling today, Frank?”

“Oh. I feel great. I did three pushups today. I’m going to get strong again.”

“Oh yeah? You better be careful not to hurt yourself.”

“I won’t. I take my time. Don’t you worry about me.”

“Okay, well, I’m telling you. You won’t be much good to anybody if you break something.”

“I know. What kind of coffee did you get?”

“I got hazelnut. This one’s your French Roast.”

“Oh. Thank you. That’s my favorite, you know.”

“Yeah, Frank, I know. That’s all you ever ask for.”

“A man knows what he likes.”

“Okay.”

Brad helped Frank sit at the table, and then took the chair across from him. The two men unwrapped pastries and sat in silence for a moment.

“What’s on your mind, friend?” Frank asked.

“Ah. You don’t need to worry about it.” Brad wiped his glasses on his shirt.

“Oh. That kind of thing. A man needs his secrets. I see.”

“Thank you.” Then: “Cheryl stopped by today.”

“Oh?”

“First time I’ve seen her in months and she says she’s getting married to some asshole.”

“Have you met him?”

“Yeah, I met him. I said I did, didn’t I?”

“No.”

“Well, I met him.”

“And he’s an asshole?”

“Sure he is. An artist or something. But regardless, he didn’t even ask my permission before he thinks he’s going to marry my daughter.”

“Cheryl’s a smart girl, isn’t she?”

“Well. I thought so.”

“So she probably knows what she’s doing.”

“Ha. You say that because you don’t know her.”

“No. I don’t. But she must do things for a reason.”

“Maybe she thinks she does.”

“Maybe. You know, Barbara sometimes did things I didn’t understand.”

“That’s great, Frank.”

“She did. But I trusted her. So I says, ‘Honey, I love you and I believe in you, but I’m staying out of the way until you ask for help.’”

“What the fuck does that even mean, Frank?”

“It means a woman gets an idea in her head, you see. You can either help her along or get out of the way, because they going to do what they want anyway. If you fight it, you lose. Every time.”

“So I should let my daughter tell me what to do?”

“No. No, but you can’t tell her what to do either.”

“She’s my daughter, for Christ’s sake.”

“Can you stop her from getting married?”

“No; if she wants to throw her life away with some fucking jerk, that’s her business.”

“You see? You can get out of the way or help her along. Think about it.”

“Yeah, thanks. That’s great. Are you done?” Brad stood and started gathering the wrappers on the table.

Frank smiled. “Yes. Thank you.”

“Yep. See you tomorrow, Frank.”

The old man stood up and put out his hand. “Thank you for coming, friend.”

Brad shook Frank’s hand. “Okay. Good seeing you.” He tucked the coffee mugs in his elbow and headed for the door. “Don’t forget to lock up.”

“Yes. I won’t. Good bye,” Frank said.

Brad pulled the door closed behind him and headed for the stairs. Back in his own apartment, he opened a beer and settled in front of the TV while the sun set through a shell of clouds.

Hours passed. He moved from his chair to his bed and stumbled over the empty beer cans on the floor. When the TV switched to infomercials, he switched it off and stared at the ceiling in the dark.

The room stopped spinning and he wasn’t even close to sleep. Another one of those nights. He picked his way to the sink for some water, and then found his shoes and coat. The night was cold, and it welcomed him.

Brad wandered through the sleepy streets. On weekends the neighborhood around the train station was busy with bar flies through the early morning, but tonight only a handful of people braved the cold. A fine mist fogged the streetlights. He passed the courtyard next to city hall where he and Lynn used to go to the farmer’s market. The last train clacked into the station behind him, and he kept walking.

He crossed the street toward a neighborhood still decorated with Christmas lights. A car roared out of the train station and blew the light by the main drag. Tires screeched around a corner and the car fishtailed into the wrong lane. The driver overcorrected and bumped the curb before swerving back onto the road and charging toward the underpass under the tracks. Streetlight made the zodiacs on the doors glitter. The sedan hit a patch of ice and skidded sideways.

Brad was already running when the driver’s side door slammed into the pillar dividing the underpass. The courtyard stretched on forever. The car’s brake lights were a fire in the freezing mist. His desperate breath echoed in the sudden silence after the crash. He slipped and scraped his hands and kept running. Headlights flashed in the underpass, a horn blared, and Brad ran down the middle of the street past an oncoming pickup.

The pickup’s driver pulled to the curb and got out yelling. The lights on the underpass spilled gold through Cheryl’s spider webbed windshield. She slumped against her seatbelt toward him, hair hiding her face, not moving. He shouted her name. The door wouldn’t open, and he shouted for her again.

The pickup driver appeared next to him with a phone to his ear. Brad wrenched the back door open and flopped into the back seat. Glass glittered all over the car’s torn upholstery. The front door was caved in all the way to the steering wheel. He reached for Cheryl’s shoulder, and she whimpered. He almost laughed through his tears.

“Cheryl? Cheryl, kid, it’s Dad. Hey, you’re gonna be okay, okay?”

She moaned and reached for her head.

“Hey, hey. It’s okay, kid. Settle down. You’ll be okay.” He brushed her hair back. Blood pattered on the upholstery, and the car hissed in the night.

“An ambulance is on the way,” the pickup driver said around his phone.

Brad barely heard him. “Good. Cheryl, you’ll be okay. I’m gonna get you help.”

“You know this bitch?”

Brad shot him a look. “She’s my daughter.”

“Oh, fuck.” The man talked into his phone again.

Cheryl leaned on the collapsed door, and Brad reached for her hand.

The ambulance wailed to a stop next to the wreck. Men in blue shirts guided him to the curb and he sat while they swarmed over the car. Police cars blocked the underpass. One of the officers approached him while the paramedics lifted Cheryl onto a stretcher.

“Sir, can I –”

Brad pushed past him and went to the paramedics. “How is she? I’m going with her. I’m—I’m her Dad. I want to go with her.”

The men in blue had a word with the police officer, and then they let Brad climb in the back of the ambulance after they loaded Cheryl’s stretcher. He rode in a daze. Tubes sprouted from Cheryl’s arms and chest. They had a mask over her face, and wrapped her head in bandages. He pressed his daughter’s hand to his forehead and willed the ambulance to drive faster.

When they pulled into the hospital, he followed the paramedics through the sliding doors until a wooly-haired nurse pried him away from the stretcher.

“That’s my daughter!” he protested.

“I understand,” she said. “But the doctors need to help her now. Is there anyone you need to call?”

“No. Her mother. Yeah. I should call Lynn.”

“Okay. Good.” She led him to a room not much larger than a closet behind the emergency room desk. A phone and a box of tissues sat on a table with a pair of soft chairs. The nurse closed the door, and he sat at the phone in a daze.

Lynn didn’t answer the first time he called, so he called back.

“Hello?” Her voice was thick.

“It’s Brad. Cheryl had an accident.”

“What? What do you want?”

“Don’t hang up. I’m at the hospital. Cheryl got in a wreck.”

“Huh? What’d you do? Is she okay?”

“I don’t know. You need to come here. She’s hurt. I don’t know how bad.”

“Where are you?”

He read the hospital’s information from the card next to the phone. He heard her gathering her things, and she hung up without saying goodbye. Brad sat alone for a while with his head in his hands. Eventually the nurse knocked on the door and told him his wife had arrived.

Lynn stared at a TV in the waiting room. He crossed the room and sat in a chair a ways away from where she stood. The nurse busied herself at her station, and Brad waited in silence.

“The police told me what happened,” Lynn said finally.

“Yeah.”

“Did you talk to her? How did she look?”

“Not good, Lynn. She’s totaled her car for Christ’s sake.”

“Why were you there? Was she with you?”

“I couldn’t sleep, okay? Will you sit down? She must’ve been out drinking. I was in the area; I hadn’t seen her since the afternoon.”

Lynn slumped onto a chair and rubbed her temples. Once the first tears came, more followed in choked sobs. Brad stared at his feet for a moment, and then leaned over the armrest to put his hand on her knee. Lynn coughed and wiped her face. She patted his hand and stood up again.

“We should probably call Mark soon,” Lynn said.

“Well. I’ll let you handle that.”

“Of course.” She paced in front of him.

“Lynn?”

“Hm?”

“Is he good to her?”

She stopped and pressed her lips together. “Yes. From what I’ve seen. She told you, then?”

“Yeah,” he laughed once. “Hell of a thing, today.” He cleared his throat. “I could have taken it better.” His voice cracked.

A sad smile pinched the side of her mouth. “I imagine. All right. I’ll call Mark.”

Brad tried to swallow after she left. The image of Cheryl in the ambulance stuck in his mind. She looked so small, lying there with bits of glass covering her, shining red in the harsh light. The adrenaline had worn off, and the twisting pain in his gut crawled up his throat. He bit a sob into his fist.

Lynn returned some time later, and Brad cleared his throat a few times.

“Mark will be here in a couple hours,” Lynn said. “There shouldn’t be much traffic this time of night.”

“Good.” He sighed. “That’s good.”

“When I told him what happened, he said he was glad you were there with her.”

Brad nodded.

“I said I was too.”

He looked up at her. His vision blurred. She held out her hand and he took it. She sat down and leaned on him. He squeezed her tightly, and together they waited.

The doctor who came for them had bags under his eyes and introduced himself as Doctor Fischer.

“Cheryl’s stable,” he said. “I can take you to her if you’d like.”

“Thank God,” Lynn said.

“How is she?” Brad asked.

“It’s this way,” Dr. Fischer said.

The look on the doctor’s face dried Brad’s mouth. He flanked Lynn as they followed down a fluorescent hallway.

Dr. Fischer spoke as they walked. “We’re going to do some more procedures for her tomorrow after she gets some rest. She’s sedated now. Her left femur will need a couple of pins, as will her left radius. It doesn’t look like there is any cognitive damage, but …”

They paused in front of a closed door. “But what?” Brad insisted.

The doctor’s face darkened, and he opened the door.

Cheryl lay swaddled in white in a bed next to a rack of beeping machines. A wire elevated her leg. Bandages hid her face from her mouth up, and thick pads of gauze covered her eyes.
Dr. Fischer’s voice dropped to a whisper. “There was significant damage to her orbital sockets. Tomorrow we’re going to try to extract the glass from her eyes. There’s a chance she may retain partial vision in her right eye.”

Lynn gasped. “What—what does that mean?”

“It means we’re going to do everything we can for her. But our best shot is transplants for both organs. I’ve gone ahead and put her name on the donor list.”

Lynn knelt at the edge of the bed and sobbed. She stroked her daughter’s bruised cheek and pressed her face into the sheets.

“Doc,” Brad managed. “What happens if there’s no donors?”

The doctor inhaled through his teeth. “Rehabilitation. We’ll get her in therapy for the sight-impaired. She’s young. She’ll get back on her feet, and we have resources to help her adjust.”

“She can’t adjust; she’s just a kid!”

“I’m sorry. We’ll help her every way we can. Hopefully they find a donor before the window closes.”

“What?” Lynn said. “What window?”

“The sooner we find a donor, the better. Scar tissue can affect the procedure. Eventually she’d get pushed down the list.”

Brad’s throat closed. Lynn said something to Dr. Fischer, and he said something back. Brad saw Cheryl with a cane and sunglasses. On her wedding day, if she would have him, she’d walk down the aisle on his arm with nothing but hushed whispers to describe how beautiful she was. He stood at the foot of the bed and looked into Cheryl’s broken face.

“So,” he began. “What does it take to be a donor?”

He felt Dr. Fischer and Lynn focus on him. His own gaze never left Cheryl.

Eventually, the doctor responded. “Basically, matching blood types and a clean disease history.”

“Right.”

Lynn appeared at his shoulder. She touched his face, and he broke his gaze from Cheryl. Lynn’s face was anguished and tugged at his heart. He tucked her hair behind her ear. Her hand found his, and he turned to face Dr. Fischer.

“All right, Doc. Where do I sign up?”

When to say goodbye

My original plan had me spending a few months this year getting my old short stories edited and polished so I could get more content up for sale. But a couple weeks of frustration taught me that I'd need to completely rewrite them in order to get them up to my current standards.

In a couple of cases, that's fine. The Experiment is a decent way to start one of my novels coming out this year, as I wrote it specifically to help me conceive that world. F&D is another. But most of these stories would take more work to fix than it would take to put out something entirely new.

Its not easy to bury a story, even years after writing it. I have to look at it like an especially deep edit. Those character may come back somewhere, sometime, but its time to thank them for what they taught me and move on. I'll leave the old posts up on this site, of only to remind myself how far I've come, but my future publications will leave them behind.

Onward...

Friday, March 16, 2012

Starting over

Once again I've been neglecting my dark little corner of the internet, but I'm going to try to change that. Updates should be more frequent for the immediate future thanks to science.

Recently I've been spending my time editing some of my old short stories. These were some of the first posts here, and if you've read them you'll agree that they needed it. I'll re-up A Father and a Daughter "soon", because it'll be a few months before I get around to doing the formatting for Kindle, and I'd rather be read than paid anyway.

The other shorts haven't been as kind to me. They were good five years ago, but like F&D, they need complete rewrites to match my standards now. So rather than beat my head against a format I'm not all that great with anyway, I've spent the last week outlining a rewrite of one of my training novels. This particular one got rejected by some 65 agents and publishers when I originally wrote it, but back then I thought editing was a luxury.

So hopefully I'll be pushing a new novel out by early summer. I'll talk about some of the rewrite process on Monday. We're looking at a weekend at Starved Rock ahead, so I'll check in again next week.

Onward...

Friday, February 17, 2012

Just a quick word on hockey

Now that the Blackhawks' worst losing streak since before the Toews era is over, the organization has sent Andrew Shaw back down to the AHL and has recalled Jimmy Hayes to take his place. Some people have a problem with this. Those people are idiots.

Andrew Shaw became something of a sensation when he scored 5 goals in his first 8 NHL games. #shawfacts trended on Twitter, people who wear pink or green Hawks jerseys claimed him as one of their favorite players, and still others who luckily don't have a voice on the internet talked about him in the same breath as Hossa and Toews.

Perhaps because of all of this, when Marcus Kruger came back from injury, the Hawks kept Shaw on the roster and sent Jimmy Hayes back down to the minors. In the next 11 games, Shaw scored 0G, 3A, and is a -8. And no one who knows anything about hockey is the least bit surprised.

Because of the Shaw hype, Hayes' first NHL experience went largely unnoticed. People who don't watch or understand hockey get really excited about goals, and so Shaw scoring 5 in 8 games was very exciting. But Hayes was, is, and will be a better player. Hayes had 3G 8A, and -1 in 13 games, which is two points better than Shaw in six fewer games. He's eight inches taller and 60lb heavier than Shaw, had a better junior career, and actually displays some hockey sense. Hayes still needs to grow into his monster body, but for a giant he displays some good hands. Hayes can obviously work the boards a lot better than Shaw, who usually flails around hopelessly until someone knocks him over.

I wouldn't be surprised to see Andrew Shaw return to the lineup later in the season, maybe when the Q realizes how useless Michael Frolik is. But expect Hayes to play more games this year, and to secure a roster spot next year. Shaw is this year's Ben Smith; useful in bursts, but not good enough to have a lasting presence unless he develops more.

Monday, February 6, 2012

In which I review a book about crazy people

Driving Me Nuts! by PJ Jones is a funny little book. You can get through it in a night, and you'll smile while you read it, but there's a lot of depth here. Ruckus and Fred sneak out of the Shady Grove mental institution every Friday, steal the orderly's car, and take a trip into town to buy ice cream and romance novels. Apple, another inmate, has bigger plans when she tricks her way onto their traditional expedition, and takes them on a road trip they'll never forget.

Right? OK, here's the deal, Driving Me Nuts! has some of the best characters I've met in a long, long time. The book has all of the things that great books have, gunfights, a love story, snappy dialogue, intense scenes, creepy bad guys, all of that. But the characters really drive this story, and they do it so well I've been thinking about them for a week. I'd liken it to the Portal video game. Yes, it's short, but it does what it does so well that part of what makes it so good is that it's so tightly crafted that there isn't any need for something longer.

In the right eye (mine), Jones teaches a class in character development in this book, and I'm a better writer for having read it. Look at it another way and you'll be hard pressed to like someone who'll piss on your mail as much as you like Ruckus. Even the weakest link of this cast of characters, the hobo, Garth Vader, is more an embodiment of magical realism than anything else, and I ain't one to knock a book over a bit of style.

Jones has deservedly gotten a fair amount of praise for her parody work, but I suspect I won't be the last fan she wins with Driving Me Nuts! instead.

5/5

Friday, February 3, 2012

The problem with aliens

I had an interesting conversation on Fark today. This sort of thing comes up every now and then, and I love the discussions that ensue. I'd like to say that I love science fiction in general, but really, I love the idea of science fiction more than I love the genre itself.

It comes down to this: if you want to make a traditional spaceships and lasers science fiction story interesting, you have to make it into a fantasy. Since I was talking about aliens today, we'll start there.

The problem with aliens, whether in a science fiction story or UFO fantasies or doomsday prediction is simple:

Any civilization that has achieved interstellar travel has no use or need for Earth or anything on it.

Interstellar travel by biological organisms requires a container that can survive years in deep space without any energy or material input. Because of the energy requirements for moving mass, it's exceptionally unlikely this closed system is stocked with enough supplies to sustain the organisms for the duration of their journey. After all, with enough energy and efficient recycling, you can create a self-sustaining closed system using far less mass.

In fact, since aliens have to obey the same laws of physics we do, any craft capable of interstellar travel would have fuel make up 95%+ of its mass. The remaining mass has to include all of the spaces, systems, and supplies that biological organisms need to survive a few decades in transit. And therin lies the problem.

Because if a civilization can create an interstellar spaceship, it can also create self-sustaining artificial habitats in a fraction of the time for a fraction of the cost.

An artificial habitat in close orbit around the civilization's home star can fabricate anything it could ever need using the star's incredible energy output and by harvesting mass ejected by stellar eruptions and stellar wind. In fact, the only difference between an artificial habitat and an interstellar spacecraft are engines and fuel. The habitat needs neither. Instead, the habitat can have more useful, practical things, like an expanded self-sustaining ecosystem to improve the quality of life of its inhabitants, or solar collectors so anything the inhabitants want or need can be manufactured in short order, or even simply more internal volume so the inhabitants don't have to spend decades hot bunking with each other.

In fact, if a civilization can create an interstellar spacecraft, there is no necessary reason it to leave the orbit of own star until their total energy consumption matches their star's output, or the star itself goes extinct. And when and if either of those things happen, their destination would be the nearest star. It takes mindboggling amounts of energy and time to travel from star to star. The fastest proposed propulsion humans have come up with would take more than 40,000 years to reach the nearest exoplanet. The same method could reach Proxima Centauri in a decade or so (assuming it actually works, and assuming it ever gets built).

And when your civilization can create anything it could ever need on an artificial habitat in close stellar orbit, why would you have any use for the rocky planets around an adopted star? Why would you travel to a star with rocky planets in orbit when there are hundreds others that are closer and give you everything you need? That's not to say that aliens would never leave their home star, just that the only reasons for doing so are curiosity and leisure.

Therefore, there is no necessary reason for aliens with access to interstellar travel to come into conflict with another civilization.


There is no competition for stars, which are the only physical resource worth mentioning. Information, the only other resource that matters, can be gathered in countless ways that are faster, cheaper, safer, and more effective than sending biological explorers into the void.

Now, yes, it's possible that an interstellar civilization would be interested in establishing trade with humanity, although anything traded would have to exceed the cost of shipping, which is unbelievably high. It's also possible some aliens would want to visit or study humans in person, even though sending a probe would be exponentially more efficient.

But it's not necessary. An interstellar civilization needs nothing from planet-bound civilizations. It cannot be threatened by them, it cannot be infringed upon by them, and it cannot be bothered with them.

Interstellar civilizations have every reason to ignore planet-bound civilizations, and no reasons to be hostile with other interstellar civilizations.

If interstellar civilizations ever come in contact with each other, it will likely be via radio, so they can trade ideas and information without ever leaving the bounty of their home and/or local star(s). Sure beats farting around in the interstellar dark for a few decades so you can look at some apes that your probes can get better pictures of anyway.

Sunday, January 29, 2012

BSOH review and the end of a draft

New review of BSOH up at The Groove in Every Road. Four out of five stars ain't bad.

Also, I finished the first draft of The Nomad Wilds today after a marathon drafting session this weekend. Like all of my first drafts, there is a lot of work to do before this book can see the light of day, but it is in better shape than the first draft of BSOH was. Which ain't sayin' much, but it's a start.

If all goes according to plan, I hope to have Nomads out late this year or early next year. For now, I'm going to read and play video games and hang out with Girlfriend like a normal person for a week, and then I'll start working on getting some of my short stories published.

And maybe, just maybe, now that I'm done drafting I can start posting here more than once a month. Maybe since I'm going to pretend to be a normal person this week, I can talk about the Superb Owl in my next post, or hockey, or some other such nonsense. We shall see.

Onward...

Wednesday, January 11, 2012

BSOH Sale

I promised myself I would spend 2012 editing, publishing, and promoting the 2 novels and half dozen short stories I have written. But we're more than a week in, and I'm still not done drafting The Nomad Wilds. And I'm looking at another couple of weeks before it's done too.

So rather than keeping my head down, I'm doing quite literally the easiest promotion I can think of.

BSOH is now $0.99 on all outlets, instead of $3.99.




I plan on leaving the price low until I finish drafting, in the interest of science. I'm curious to see how it does at the lower price point without any other variables. Once I start putting out the shorts in the next couple of months, I may hike it back up. Again, for science.

Also, I'm in talks about getting an audio version made sometime in the near-mid future. Keep an ear out.

Wednesday, December 21, 2011

A Solstice rant

So here's something.




A little background first. I grew up in a very religious household and went to the Church of the Nazarene for my entire childhood into highschool. I started questioning things around age 17, considered myself a Christian until 21, and it took until I was 23 before I could comfortably identify as a Humanist. I've lived around people like our commenter here for most of my life. I know the arguments, I know the tactics, I know the type.

It's the winter solstice today, which is the basis for damn near every winter holiday, including Christmas. I was debating whether or not to do a post relating to it, but I think this rant will have to suffice.

Here's my problem with our Facebook commentator above: A comment that on its face appears to be helpful, kind, and caring is in fact ignorant, hateful, and full of malice. And this type of comment is so typical that the commenter may not even realize what she's saying.

Let's break it down:

My pastor just had a great explanation for this...

This is not an original insight by our friend that she's about to go into. I know this because I used the same tactic on people when I was growing up. She's a messenger, you see. This isn't what she thinks, this is just what she was told. The effect is that any counter argument you have cannot be had with her. You'd have to go talk to her pastor. She can preach, but you can't argue. The Bible citations that follow use the same tactic.

"God made mankind upright, but men have gone in search of many schemes." Ecclesiates 7:29. He says that humans are inately bad, evil, sinful, and children of wrath (Ephesians 2:3)

One of my biggest problems with the faith is summed up here. But I'll skip that argument until another time. Just keep this passage in mind.

However, Jesus came to change our sinful nature and give us a new heart (2 Cor. 5:17). We can trust Him because he is the ultimate source of love, truth, goodness

Here we go. You have a number of mutually contradictory assumptions here. I'm going to argue from the Christian mythology here, because those are the rules we're playing by today.

IF humans are inherently evil, AND IF Jesus is the ultimate source of good, THEN all humans born before Jesus were inherently evil, sinful, and wrathful.

This means one of three things:

In Christian mythology, that means the entire 4000 years of humanity before Jesus was filled with nothing but evil and sin. This is true in spite of the countless examples of virtue and love in the Old Testament. Every human born before Jesus, every hero in the OT, is condemned to hell for eternity.
OR
Humans can be good only through Jesus, or, prior to him, the Holy Spirit. So every human who does not follow Jesus, even those who openly reject him, is either entirely evil, or is only capable of love and kindness because of a God they do not follow. This appears to make following God irrelevant, as God manifests whether we want him to or not.
OR
Humans are capable of love and kindness independent of God and Jesus. Humans are not inherently evil. Therefore there is no need for humans to be saved, which undermines the central tenant of the religion.

Knowing this has made me realize how special it is when people really do care and show us goodness/kindness. :-)

This 'knowledge' is as real to this person as the screen you're reading this on. Maybe moreso. I cannot emphasize enough how deeply these beliefs run to people who have never been wholeheartedly religious.

And that's what makes this whole thing so insidious. Our friend doesn't realize that she's telling the original poster (who is spiritual/agnostic at best) that he's going to hell. She doesn't realize that she's calling him an evil, hateful person. She doesn't realize that she's telling him that none of the good things he does aren't because he's a good person. Only the bad things he does are wholly his own. Someone else gets credit for all of the good in his life, and all of the good he brings to other people's lives.

And she and others like her get away with saying this like this because they really are trying to help. And that comes through in her presentation. It's a nice thing to say, as long as you don't think about what isn't said.

So I'd like to respond with my own cited advice, from a different story.

My girlfriend just had a great explanation for this...
The Younger Children of Illuvatar woke with the first rising of the Sun and communed with the Elves, but the lies of the Dark King brought ruin to their race (17 SIL). Bummer, right? But the blood of Numenor carried the light of Manwae through the ages to give us strength (1 ALK). We can trust the descendants of the Line of Kings because they are the ultimate source of courage, virtue, and righteousness. Knowing this has made me realize how special it is when people stand up for what they believe in.

Tuesday, December 13, 2011

Illusions of accomplishment

Something I'm just realizing that I struggle with is the illusion of accomplishment. It's come up during the last couple of weeks while I get back into a groove after a disastrous November, and the more I think about it the more I identify other times I've found myself in the same trap.

In November I ran some numbers, did some projections, and found out that all of the work I've been doing on my Master Plan is actually working. I'm still more than a year away from bringing everything to fruition, but I can see the end from here. It's one thing to tell myself every day for the last five years that I'm going to succeed eventually, and it's an entirely different thing to look at a pile of math and see that I will actually succeed by a certain date. There is still some projection involved, but there's also a timeline that isn't "eighteen months from now", like it has been for the last 5 years.

Realizing this threw me for a bit of a loop. I told anyone who would listen that hey, look, I'm not entirely delusional. All of these things I've been doing are working. And the feedback I got was universally positive and encouraging and made me feel pretty good about myself. Made me feel vindicated a little, that I've done something good.

But I haven't. Not yet. The amount of work I need to do between now and victory is staggering. More than I've ever done in that timeframe, honestly. And if it doesn't get done, that master timeline starts floating again.

And that part trips me up. See, it is awesome to tell people all the things you've done, and how successful you are, and how you have grand plans and grand ambitions and that you're going places with your life. And it is so much easier to tell people those things than it is to actually do them. You get all of the positive social feedback with none of the mindbending solitary work. You can make a couple friends at a party pitching a good ambitious line, and get heaps of love at the dinner table just for talking about what you gonna do.

And oh man, am I susceptible to that business. I get so wrapped up in my own schemes a lot of times that I forget how to make good table conversation. So if I get a chance to talk about my plans and be lauded for presenting them like they're a done deal, I'm all up ons. Once I start on that path, it's pretty easy to go along with all of the back patting. I start to relax a little, start to believe that I've done a good job. And that leads all to quickly to days and weeks passing by without making any progress.

It's ultimately illogical, that response. When I'm running a race, I don't start walking as soon as I see the finish line. No, no, that's when the afterburners go on (little, tiny, RC Flyer afterburners, but I use what I got). Logically, I should have looked at those numbers I crunched and braced myself for the whirlwind of work that I need to do in order to get over the top.

So I'm working on that part right now. Keeping up the pace I should be setting for a year+ seems almost impossible. I've never gone that hard for that long. Not even close. A month, sure. Three months even. But not five, six times that. But I don't have to know that. I don't have to acknowledge it. I just need to blitz the rest of today, and then I can go to sleep. And I'm pretty sure I can blitz tomorrow too. So I'm just going to focus on crushing my work today, and having a good followup tomorrow. Just like I've always done. It's crunch time, but I've done crunch time before. Until it's over, it's probably best to shut up about what I'm gonna do, and just get this shit done first.

Onward...

Thursday, December 8, 2011

Free books!


I reviewed a book called The Black God's War a couple of months ago. I really liked it; still the best book I've read this year. And today on Kindleboards, Moses Siregar III announced a limited giveaway to ring in the holidays.

I can give away a copy of this outstanding book to five people with a Kindle/Kindle app. First come, first serve.

Quoth the author:
"I just need the names and email addresses of anyone who would like a gifted copy of my novel through Amazon.com. Make sure to ask for the email address that the person has on file with Amazon. I can also send them other formats, such as epub, but I don't like to share pdfs."

Email me if you'd prefer to not post your email in the comments.

Monday, December 5, 2011

I have returned

November was a thing. People I don't know slept in my house, I ran a race, I got sick, I went to concerts, I got sick again, I ate more Thanksgiving dinners than a family of four, I drank a few bottles of whiskey which made me get sick a third time, and saw some friends I haven't seen since college. Along the way, I came up with a plan that will see me with six published titles by this time next year.

Here's the deal. I'm THIS many chapters from finishing the draft of The Nomad Wilds. If I continue kicking my word counts in the face, it'll be done by the end of the month. The first novel I wrote needs a new title, new plot, and a good once-over, but I can make edits on that in a couple of months once Nomads is done. That comes out in March. Six short stories need the same treatment and will take a week each and another week to organize them into a couple of collections. That puts me at the beginning of April. Start the edits on Nomads then, and I'll be working on the new non-fiction book I have in mind throughout. Assuming I am not delayed, both of those get out next fall. Six titles in time for the next Christmas spender bender.

As far as the present is concerned, I'm a little more confused. Battlesongs of Hope is still selling, even though I've been acting like it doesn't exist for more than a month. No forums, no promotion of any kind, and it's still plugging along. Hell, I haven't so much as updated Facebook more than twice in the last five weeks, and in November I had twice as many pageviews as I did in my previous best month. I don't know who you people are or where you come from, but I hope you stick around. Welcome.

But on to the important things. I mentioned a non-fiction book. Well. I has an idea. And since I think in words I'm going to be working through it here before it goes into book form. It goes back to conversations with Girlfriend and working through her myriad bits of individuality.

My current embryonic belief is that that the tendency towards positive or negative decisions is primarily a function of a person's relations to input and their perceptions of output. In turn, a person's inputs and outputs are affected by a number of paired relationships. I currently call the sum of these paired relationships the dimensions of discipline because they create a matrix in which a person can be highly disciplined in some areas and highly undisciplined in others. And the real kicker, the thing that got me to start this exploration, is that in a single given person, two IDENTICAL inputs in IDENTICAL circumstances can produce two entirely DIFFERENT yet equally logical outputs. Yet there is a pattern and predictability to those outputs, and I intend to discover it.

The factors at play are these:
• Long term vs short term
• Self love vs self destruction
• Peace vs progress
• Resting vs working

There may be more, but those are the ones that I'm working with now. I'll have more in subsequent posts; for now I have to do my squats because I have not lifted in several weeks and am visibly withering.

Onward...

Monday, October 17, 2011

Guest post over on PJ Jones Writes

Jubeebee's very first guest blog post is live over on PJ Jones's blog. She writes some brutally funny satire, as well as original comedy novels. Head on over.

Sunday, October 16, 2011

Checking in on a catchup Sunday

It's been a while since I've logged any of my progress drafting The Nomad Wilds, partially because I've been rolling so hard I haven't felt the need. This week was the first in three that I've averaged less than a thousand words a day, and that was because circumstances conspired to prevent me from drafting at all on Monday and Tuesday.

And the reason things have been flying along so well is because I finally, after getting about 30,000 words in, have identified the central plot. I have heard that some writers insist on having a plot before they start writing a book, but I refuse to be bound by such notions. Previously, I had thought that Nomads would be a 'smaller' book than BSOH; the central conflict had a more limited scope, and everything just seemed a little less severe. No longer. We've got some serious world-shaking shit going on now, and Brandon and the rest of the crew are in WAY over their heads. The primary antagonists have changed, and their motives are deliciously gray, rather than the stark good vs evil that I was working with before.

So while I had worried earlier in the year that I wasn't going to get Nomads drafted by the end of the year, now I'm thinking that I may get this finished by early December. Which would mark the first time ever that I've met one of my personal deadlines.

In other aspects of the Master Plan, I deloaded about 25lb on squats this week to adjust to my new lifting belt. First workout I hit every rep high, but Thursday I buried dem sumbitches nice and deep, so I'm going to hop on the linear progression train for the next few weeks and see if I can get to a 3 plate squat by Thanksgiving. Can't push lifting too hard because I have a pair of 5k races coming up in the next six weeks, but as long as I drink my milk and don't deadlift the day before the race (yes, I've done it; do not recommend), I should be fine.

And I might as well admit it, my football predictions for this year were juuuust a bit off. Between injuries and bad coaching, the Bears O-line looks worse than it did last year. Cutler and Forte have been playing their balls off, but when the best receiver is an undrafted slot guy, and your best lineman is an injured rookie, you've got problems. And the thing is, all of that would be fine if the defense didn't completely implode over the offseason. Peppers hasn't shown up since week 1, the safety turnstile is spinning so fast it could power a city block, and for all Briggs has complained about wanting a new contract, he sure isn't making a very good case for one. Urlacher can't carry this team anymore, although he's doing his damndest to try.

The good news is the Blackhawks look solid and I've got a date with the Arboretum and a pumpkin patch next weekend. So pop a beer and hunker down; it's time to blitz all the way to the end of the year.

Onward...

Wednesday, October 12, 2011

In which I review a Mideastern fantasy

The Black God's War by Moses Siregar III is the best book I've read this year. The scope of this epic fantasy may not come through in this review, but I'll do my best.

The kingdoms of Rezzia and Pawleon are locked in their tenth year of war, fought mostly around the vast desert canyon at the foot of the Pawelon fortress that guards the entrance to the Pawelon countryside. Both kingdoms sense an end to the war is coming. For Rezzia, their Haizzem, Caio, son of King Vieri, is prophesied to lead the kingdom to victory. For Pawelon, the arrival of Rajah Devak's son Rao, the most powerful sage in memory, promises to save the besieged land from King Vieri's forces. And in the middle of it all, Caio's sister Lucia is haunted by the Black God Danato, one of Rezzia's pantheon of ten gods.

The story is mostly presented from the perspectives of Lucia, Caio, and Rao. The true strength of the book is how even-handed the characters are presented. There are no real evil or good characters, just characters with differing goals and perspectives. Nor are any of the characters archetypes out of an RPG, which is one of my pet peeves with epic fantasy. Siregar plays with his characters perceptions and expectations throughout the book; what is black magic to one character is merely a different way to see the world to a different character.

One of the most magical things about this story is the setting. Rather than the usual northwestern Europe setting, The Black God's War takes place in a location that seems to be an Arabic/Persian/Greek mashup. Think Alexander more than Arthur. Additionally, the magic system is unique and fresh (at least to me), and is a welcome change from your normal ritualistic spellcasting.

Honestly, this is the hardest review I've had to write because I feel like I'm repeating myself. Everything, characters, motives, setting, plot, message, philosophy, fight scenes, love interests, everything in this book is start to finish good. If any element stands above the rest it's probably the magic system, which is closely tied to the overall philosophy and plot, yet it remains subtle enough to stay out of the way of the story.

If I was a professional reviewer I'd have more to say, but I'm not so I'll say this. The Black God's War is the best new fantasy book you can buy, and I include my own novel in that statement. I highly recommend it.

5/5

(My review policy)

Tuesday, October 4, 2011

Strength therapy

Tonight I deadlifted 300lb for a set of 5.

In strength training terms, that's like running a 9:30 mile. Not everyone can do it, but you can throw a rock in your local high school athletic department and hit a dozen guys who can do better. But for me, it's a big deal.

When I was 17 I tore a muscle in my lower back. I had no athletic history, and basically did everything you're not supposed to do with a muscle tear. The pain got progressively worse over the course of several months. It would wake me up at night, and it took up to twenty minutes to get out of bed. I couldn't stand fully upright, and I developed a limp.

More than a year later my family saved up enough to get me an MRI. We didn't have health insurance, so it took a while. Prognosis was that the second degree muscle tear had healed improperly, developed significant scar tissue, and was essentially folded upon itself.

I finally made it into physical therapy during the summer I turned 19. It was eight weeks of hell. The right side of my pelvis sat about 3/4" higher than the left, and was twisted forward about 10 degrees. Therapy was supposed to fix that, and it did, mostly by brute force. Breaking up the scar tissue was the worst part.

But for the three years after that, the injury never really got better. The therapist gave me some stretches to do, and told me to do some core exercises when the pain got really bad. But I was in college and the rec center was intimidating, so I did enough to manage the pain and gritted through it.

Sometimes at night when it was flaring up and I was lying on the floor because my bed felt like a knife in my back I thought about how unfair it was that I had another sixty-odd years of living in pain every day. Other people didn't have to wince whenever they got into a car, or make a plan when they wanted to lie down or stand up. Other people could sneeze or cough without feeling like they'd been hit with an ice pick. It was very, very frustrating.

But one day in spring of 2007, a few months after I graduated college, I felt a flare up coming on while I was sitting at my computer. They always started as a sort of hot tightness just above my hip. And I must have been fed up already that day because I just could not take it anymore. Swearing my head off, I looked up some real exercises and got down on the floor. If I hurt because I was weak, motherfucker, I'm not going to be weak anymore.

A half hour later, I had done 7 situps and 3 pushups. It hurt so much I don't remember much except the last situp. Staring at the ceiling, sun glaring through the window, knowing that moving would hurt that much more, trying to convince myself that doing ONE MORE situp would pay off in the long run. So I did it.

The next day I bought a couple of gallons of water to use as weights because I was too intimidated to buy dumbbells. I told myself that I'd try doing exercises every other day for six weeks, and if things got better, I'd stick with it.

They did, and I did.

I went from bodyweight exercises to dumbbells, dumbbells to machines, machines to barbells. It took a couple of years before I stopped having flare ups on a regular basis. They're still a possibility now; that scar tissue won't go away without surgery, but when they happen I know a routine that smooths them out in one week.

Eight years ago my physical therapist told me to strengthen my core to manage the pain. Tonight I deadlifted 300 pounds, and there was no pain.